The World Is Quiet Here

"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together" -Marilyn Monroe

[S.19.NY. Avatar]

I don’t want to write
anymore—not when you’re all
my words embody

but it would also be as simple

Choosing my favorite thing
About you would be as
Difficult as finding the first
Raindrop to fall during
an angry storm at sea

For a second I
forgot all about you; I
felt you all the same

You took me by storm today
And with no umbrella I had no choice
But to feel you in every drop of rain
And hear you in the sweeping gusts of wind, like walking past a familiar scent
That’s been engrained in your soul
And plunges you into yesterdays,
You swallowed me in unrelenting waves — and all you had to do was
Walk by and nod ‘hello’

When I no longer
Pick up my guitar, that is
When you should worry

random thoughts because 2am

Hopefully I master the art form of a proper sleeping habit sometime before the next life.

Also I should probably get out of the habit of writing entire posts and then deleting them.

I’ve been on autopilot these past few days, weeks maybe who knows . But the good part of that is I’ve accepted certain things as true: contrary to popular belief certain things are just not meant for everyone. Namely answers, dreams, drive, 11:11 wishes that come true,  love, movie-like adventures, Audrey Hepburn’s grace..just to name a few.

I’m done. With a lot of things. One of them being this pointless post.

Good night . 

I never told you
of the wishes I made to
stars on your behalf

I looked down and there I was
Gaping hole where my chest would be
Calloused hands and gnarled fingers,
An arm outstretched reaching for
Something, what exactly— I dont know
Blank face and ghost eyes,
Traces of a smile line my face
The greying skin breaking to reveal
Brittle bones and decaying ligaments

I look up and there I was
Fresh spring buds blooming,
Pedals stretch and wake from their
Long slumber underground,  this is
What they’ve waited for, a sun
Radiating warmth and light, and
Listen—birds chirping to their content
Trees, deeply rooted still as strong as
They were before the grueling winter
Frosts stung at their trunks and
Pulled at their leaves
There I was in the breeze, sweeping
And cooling —free and alive

I looked down,
I was gone

Message
received,
universe
Loud and
clear.

While others crave familiarity
I dream of distance, the appeal
Of becoming immersed in a new
Atmosphere,  with no friendly faces
Or memorized beaten paths suddenly
Becoming a great motivator
No matter how deluded it is to believe
Putting any number of miles
Between myself and everything I know
Would solve all the problems, calm
This inner turmoil and dissipate the
Anger that’s been expanding inside
My chest for as long as I’ve
Been running towards the horizon